Dr Judith Orloff's Blog

Beware of the Go-For-The-Jugular Vampire

Judith Orloff - Wednesday, October 19, 2016

Adapted from Dr. Judith Orloff's ”Positive Energy: 10 Extraordinary Prescriptions for Transforming Fatigue, Stress, and Fear into Vibrance, Strength, and Love ”

One of the most malevolent of bloodsuckers, this person is vindictive and cuts you down with no consideration for your feelings.

Driven by envy, competition, or severe insecurity they deflate your energy with just the right insult. Their jabs can be so hurtful, and are hard to get them out of your head. Whoppers my patients have endured include: “Darling, gray hair is so unattractive;” “Forget him. He’s way out of your league;” “Don’t be absurd, you’re not material for that job!” Some are unapologetically bent on bloodlust; others are more passive aggressive. This fiend uses their own darkness to maim and insinuates that darkness in you, a maneuver they probably learned from their parents at the dinner table. Energetic fallout from these vampires is nuclear, leaves you sickened by siphoning vital energy. Excessive exposure can cause illnesses from chronic fatigue to depression.

In my book, Positive Energy, I discuss The Go-For-The-Jugular Vampire, who is the most damaging when they have you cornered. The place you least want to be is stuck in a car with them. The noxious vibes from their comments pollute that closed environment. You, the recipient, can practically feel them congealing in your arteries. Research has shown that driving brings out horrific behavior; cars are a set-up for road rage, aggression, and family warfare. A common form of spousal abuse is for one partner to verbally incinerate the other in a car, and start driving erratically. Heed this warning. If you suspect someone belongs to this vampire species, don’t even consider getting into that vehicle!

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The Secrets to Managing Overwhelm

Judith Orloff - Monday, September 19, 2016

Adapted from Dr. Judith Orloff's ”Positive Energy: 10 Extraordinary Prescriptions for Transforming Fatigue, Stress, and Fear into Vibrance, Strength, and Love ”

Over the years, throngs of stressed out patients have come to my office to consult me about burnout. Mothers, actors, teachers, dog groomers, each with their own reasons why life is overwhelming.

When they are feeling overwhelmed one of the first aspects I address is how to pace themselves in a rhythm that makes intuitive sense for them. Just as heart beat and respirations determine our physiological tempo, pacing sets our subtle energy clock’s timing. Often we get caught in extremes.

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Are You Having an Emotional Affair?

Judith Orloff - Friday, June 24, 2016

(Excerpt from Dr. Judith Orloff's national bestseller The Power of Surrender: Let Go and Energize Your Relationships, Success, and Well-Being)

A soul mate relationship is based on trust, commitment, and a strong desire to be together.

Still, despite this powerful bond, it’s also true that your hearts will be stretched in countless ways. The danger, especially during challenging times, is that you may be vulnerable to having an emotional affair. This can damage trust and stop you from surrendering to the growth needed for your relationship.

What is an emotional affair?

I describe it as when you turn to a friend or co-worker for emotional (not physical) intimacy. The seduction is that this person gives you what you feel your mate doesn’t: support, ego boosts, empathy, playfulness, an undercurrent of flirting or attraction. Initially, this can seem innocent but you may begin to share more with this “safe” person than with your mate.

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Taming Your Inner Slave Driver

Judith Orloff - Monday, May 16, 2016

Adapted from Dr. Judith Orloff’s NY Times bestseller “Emotional Freedom: Liberate Yourself From Negative Emotions and Transform Your Life” (Three Rivers Press, 2011)

Your inner slave driver must be tamed if you want to have a happy, balanced life.

Your inner slave driver is the part of you that’s addicted to workaholism, rushing, and going nonstop until you drop. If you don’t put in a ten-hour day, you get anxious. Also, you feel guilty relaxing or taking time off from work or solving emotional problems. In your mind, to feel calm is to feel guilt, a linkage you must first notice and then reprogram. The inner slave driver shows no mercy. Unchecked, it’ll whip you into an anxious state of physical and emotional collapse. To transform anxiety, rein in your slave driver by treating yourself with more compassion, turning down the tension, and regularly planning stress-free interludes.

Once, during an anxious period when my inner slave driver took over, I dreamed that a ceramic mug I loved with “Dance-Sing-Play” on it, cracked. This upset me because I couldn’t drink tea from it anymore. Upon awakening I got the message: to have more fun and put less pressure on myself so that I didn’t crack. Similarly, oversee your inner slave driver. Staying mindful of this voice and saying an emphatic “no” to it preserves calm.

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4 Positive Beliefs that Promote Healing

Judith Orloff - Wednesday, March 02, 2016

(Adapted from Guide to Intuitive Healing: 5 Steps to Physical, Emotional, and Sexual Wellness Harmony Books, 2001 by Judith Orloff MD)

Many of us spend a lifetime creating and listening to negative voices. Where do they come from? Why do they persist? To begin with, they echo the words of parents, teachers, and other authority figures as well as normal individual insecurities.

I appreciate from my own experience how tenacious negative voices can be. They feed on our apprehensions and on the part of ourselves that is reluctant to be large. Just when you think they're gone-they're ba-ack. Nonetheless, there comes a point when you must decide if you want a life that is fear-driven or one founded on love and hope.

Here’s a perspective to help you silence your negative voices from my book, Guide to Intuitive Healing. The beliefs ensure that you will heal as speedily and painlessly as possible. If you are going through a healing crises or illness or simply want to feel more vibrant, I suggest that you embrace all of them.

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